


David

by Kawaiicoyote



Category: Glee
Genre: Angst, Funeral, Gen, Regret, Suicide
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-06-11
Updated: 2012-06-11
Packaged: 2017-11-07 12:18:09
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,041
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/431102
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kawaiicoyote/pseuds/Kawaiicoyote
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>They could have prevented this.</p>
            </blockquote>





	David

**Author's Note:**

> Random spark of inspiration. Set after "Heart".

He’s in French when the announcement comes over the intercom. His amusement at being able to insult Azimio Adams without him understanding one word fills him with a thrill of amusement. An amusement that is short lived as the intercom crackles to life and a silence falls over the room.

“Students, this is your principal speaking,” Kurt snorts quietly to himself because who else would it really be. “And it is with a heavy heart that I am to announce that former William McKinley student, David Karofsky, has taken his own life earlier this morning…”

Kurt sits frozen in his desk. His earlier amusement completely erased. His mind races as he tries to figure out if they’d had another student by the same name. But he already knows that answer. It’s a heavy resounding no.

He tunes out Figgins’ speech about how Ms. Pillsbury’s office is open to those in need of grief counseling.  A quick look to his left and he can see that beside him, Azimio is crying in earnest.  That’s right, Dave and him had been friends hadn’t they

It takes him a moment to realize that’s the first time in his school career that he’s ever seen the football player cry.

It takes him another moment to realize that he’s shaking like a leaf.

There’s a knock at the door and then it opens. Kurt managed to tear his eyes away from his shaking hands, looking up to see Finn.

Finn’s face is flushed and he’s wearing his gym clothes. He must have been in the weight room, probably ran all the way across the school.

Kurt doesn’t ask questions when he’s pulled from his desk, his bag and books all forgotten, and is lead into the hall.

As soon as the door closes behind them Kurt falls apart. His knees buckle and in an instant Finn is pulling his step-brother close.

Kurt wants to object to being held, to tell Finn that he reeks of sweat and should let him go. But his throat is burning and he feels like he can’t breathe and the only thing keeping him from screaming is the fact that his throat feels like it has swollen shut and his face is buried into Finn’s workout shirt as he sobs.

Kurt barely registers when he feels more than two arms hugging around him. It dons on him that Sam, Puck, and Mike must have come from the gym with Finn. He wants to tell them to back off because he feels like he’s suffocating, but he’s crying even harder boarding on hysterics and can’t bring himself to say anything.

It’s a few days later when he sees David for the last time, or his coffin rather, as he’s lowered into the ground. There isn’t a cloud in the sky and there’s a crisp bite to the air that makes Kurt shiver. Mercedes and Rachel squeeze one of his hands while Finn lets him clutch onto his with the other.

Behind his sunglasses the he’s refused to take off since they stepped onto the plush cemetery grass he can see the whole Glee club came along with McKinley’s football club mixed along with the majority of the junior and senior class from McKinley.

He spots Santana across in the crowd. She’s gripping Brittany’s hand like a lifeline, her eyes puffy and an almost scowl on her face as she tries not to cry. Kurt knows exactly what she’s thinking, because he’s thinking it too.

So many people in the crowd are so quick to be here now for David, but couldn’t be there to be his pillar of support when he was alive and needing help. When he was hurting and scared and alone.

David had died alone.

The thought has Kurt swaying on his feet and Finn surprisingly let’s go of his hand as so he can wrap his arm firmly around his shoulders. Kurt leans against his brother heavily and guilt and regret wash over him in waves.

They could have prevented this. They could have done more, put aside their differences to help. They could have been there for him when he needed someone.

Instead he’d pushed him away, ignored his calls and texts. Hadn’t even checked up on him after the disaster that was Valentine’s Day.

Near Santana Kurt sees the blonde boy from Valentine’s Day. It makes his blood boil because he knows he’s the one who outed David. But his anger waves a bit, not much but a bit, when he sees the boy. His suit looks wrinkled and his face is splotchy and tear streaked. Kurt sees so much anguish and regret in the boy’s features; it mirrors almost to a T what he himself is feeling.

The service is beautiful but Kurt can’t pay attention. He can’t focus on what anyone is saying. It isn’t until they’re laying the dirt atop David does Kurt snap to attention. 

Finn, Mercedes, and Rachel are still holding onto him. He’s aware that Glee club members are still there as well as Mr. Schue but that all fades to the back when he looks up and sees Mr. Karofsky.

He’s standing there with his hand resting on David’s grave marker. He’s crying freely and Kurt realizes he’s more or less holding himself up by leaning on the concrete marker.

Kurt breaks free of the trio holding on to him and on unsteady legs he crosses to Mr. Karofsky’s side.

The silence between them holds everything each of them is thinking. _I wasn’t there, I couldn’t save him, I didn’t help him_

Kurt doesn’t even think, he just takes Paul Karofsky’s hand. The man doesn’t say anything, but his grip is strong as he holds onto Kurt’s hand. One by one, each of the Glee members cross over to them and form their own circle until Mr. Schue ends the ring and is putting his own hand in Paul’s other hand.

Normally they would sing about their feelings. But today, there is no song to take away their pain. They do not have a voice. There is only the silence that they share, and it is louder than any song that they could sing that their voices can’t find.

 

 


End file.
